Why I decided to become an Egg Donor
Making the decision to become an Egg Donor did not happen overnight for me. It took me almost two years to make this big decision. I had first heard about Egg Donation through a friend of my sister’s. She had done six donor cycles and although I did not know her, my sister said that she was very happy with her decision to donate her eggs. She posted pictures of herself through various stages of her cycles and she appeared to be very proud to be a donor. But at this point, I still wasn’t even considering this being a part of my life.
Then, my sister decided to go ahead and search for a couple who were looking for an Egg donor. She was very excited and even more so when she found a couple in need. We are close and she shared all of the details of the process with me. I even drove her to one of her appointments. Yet, I still wasn’t considering the option of becoming a donor myself. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to do it, but I just didn’t even consider it. I was going to school at the time and didn’t give it any thought. I guess it just wasn’t something that was important to me at the time.
Things changed in 2011 when I gave birth to my son. He was a surprise and I had always told myself I would never have kids. I had never been really interested in babies that much. But, when they put my baby boy in my arms, as cliché as it sounds, I was hooked. There is love for your parents, love for your siblings and even love for your friends, but nothing comes even close to the love you have for your children. I look at my son sometimes and my heart could burst with how much love I have for him. Sometimes, when he is sleeping, I just stare at him and think about how amazing he is. Even though parenting is one of the most challenging tasks out there, there really isn’t anything that brings me greater joy than my son.
Flash forward four years and egg donation is brought up again by my sister. She was trying to conceive her own child at the time but was planning on going ahead and continuing to be an egg donor afterwards. So, I thought about it and decided to fill out a donor profile. As I was answering the questionnaire, I stopped at the question where it asked me why I wanted to become an egg donor. It was an easy answer. I loved being a parent. I loved my son and I cherished every minute we’ve had together. I couldn’t imagine my life without him and I knew I wanted to help couples who couldn’t have a baby. I kept thinking to myself how unfair it is that conceiving a baby could come so easy to others and could not come at all for others. That folks, is the reason I became an egg donor. Not once but, I donated a total of 5 times.
If I could give any advice to all the Intended Parents out there on behalf of us donors, it would be to appreciate your donor. I know that you have had so many years of disappointment and likely do not have the energy to worry about us, but we are giving you life. We are helping you create your family and to fulfill your dreams. Being a donor can be challenging at times, but three of my recipients took the time to write to me, anonymously of course and that meant the world to me. It meant that I wasn’t just an egg making machine to them. The first letter brought tears to my eyes as I read through it and they thanked me for the “gift” I had given them and told me how they have spent years and years trying to conceive and the heartache that brought to them. It really was at that point that I knew I had made the right choice.
Although I don’t know if any of my recipients went on to have children with my eggs, in my heart I hope that I was able to help them bring a child into this world and wish them all the best. I’m proud to be a donor and so thankful to the couples who chose me to be their donor.